Love As a Chemical Explosion
You learned your first love lesson during a chemistry class. Of course. Ain't love just chemistry? Isn't it an exchange, a mixing, and the burning of passion?
You were taught that atoms are the basic unit of matter. And that within every atom are sub-atomic particles: the neutrons with the protons housed in the core and the streams of electrons revolving around them.
You were told that for a bond to exist electrons must be displaced. An exchange must occur. For water to become, hydrogen must give up something for oxygen. But the beauty is that they two become one. A merge. An emergence.
You understood valency. You were told that elements rarely exist on their own. They are unstable. Constantly yearning to become one with another. Yearning to merge. To become something else. To emerge as something different.
You were told that valency makes these atoms agitated. Unstable. Imbalance. And for stability to occur, there must be an exchange. A giving and a receiving. An electrovalency. That oxygen would have to receive twice from hydrogen to form water. Hence, water becomes a child of this sacrifice, this marriage.
To bond, one must give and another receive.
The class ended. And you left wondering how hydrogen must feel in this exchange. How it must feel to be a hydrogen. To be the one that gives up. To be the one that is demanded from. Twice.
But you soon realize that water isn't hydrogen or oxygen. Although formed from this bond, it is neither of them. It is whole in itself. There is neither a grumbling hydrogen in it nor a thankful or surprisingly unappreciative oxygen. It is just water, a product of a mutual exchange
An exchange. A bond is formed from an exchange. Could this be all love is about? Isn't it the destiny of hydrogen to give and the fate of oxygen to receive? Isn't both made complete in this exchange? Is hydrogen losing by giving out or becoming stable in the exchange? Isn't this just a role they play? One must give and another receive for they to become something essential, something useful. Something more abundant, something stable.
Another day, in another lesson.
You were taught that some elements would rather share their electrons so that a new compound can become and not need to give or receive. No need for an exchange. A covalent bond: two equally deficient atoms coming together to complete each other. A complementary bond. To become something else, not by giving up or receiving, but by sharing.
It is the fate of humans to become something more. A destiny to transcend the status quo. Everything in nature grows. To love is to deviate from the forces of entropy. To become structured, to become composed, to become whole.
Isn't this what love is? A molecular force, an atomic pull, a subatomic attraction, an elemental yearning for another? To be one with them? To become something new?
Isn't it our destiny to love? To be loved? To become something new?
What is water without the love of hydrogen for oxygen? What is a diamond if not the covalent affinity between carbon atoms?
Affinity? Attraction? Desire?
Does hydrogen desire oxygen?
You realize that love occurs when your atoms desire the atoms of another. A subatomic attraction. Those are not butterflies in your stomach. It's a migration. Your atoms are excited by the presence of another equally excited atom. A flurry of excited atoms at the core of your being. An excitement.
Love is energy. An exchange of energy. The sweaty palms, the heart beating fast, the dryness of the mouth. The uneasiness. The piercing crush. The redness on your cheek. All proves right. When atoms are excited they give off heat. Thermionic emission.
Love is atomic. Atomic love. Love at the subatomic level. An exchange. A confluence of identities. A becoming of one. An emergence of a new identity independent of the individual property. We don't taste oxygen in water. We don't smell hydrogen in water. This fusion is perfect.
Love is perfect. To love is perfection. To be loved is perfection. The art of lovemaking is perfection. A bonding. A becoming. A merge. An emergence.
Compatibility?
It's all chemistry. Certain interactions between certain elements are turbulent. Certain interactions between certain elements are inert. It is what it is. Nature. Natural.
Soul mates?
Hydrogen isn't made for only oxygen. It is not the fate of hydrogen to become just water. With oxygen, yes. But with nitrogen, a different element, it becomes Ammonia. Something different. Something equally useful. Like water to the crops. It is equally a useful compound that spurs the growth of vegetation. To sustain life.
It is not the destiny of an element to only interact with another specific one.
We are all elemental, yearning to become. To merge. We become what we are meant to become. The hydrogen in Ammonia would never think it'd have been better off if it was in water. Does oxygen ever have an elemental or existential angst?
You begin to realize the Miracle of Love. To love and be loved is indeed a rare occurrence. Although oxygen has a strong affinity for hydrogen, the two can’t just merge and become. There are billions of hydrogen interacting with billions of oxygen but not all bond to become water.
For the two to become water, there must be a high supply of energy in the form of lightning between them to cause the transformation. An activation energy. In the absence of this energy, they remain just elements. Independent. Unstable.
There can be an attraction, an affinity between two persons, but for them to become something beautiful, something more, there must be a spark of love. A lightning bolt of desire. An activation energy. A je ne sais quoi.